America's Next Top Model: Makin' the "Short" List
LA's the place
Tyra brought all 32 prospective contestants back to her hometown of L.A. -- the glam locale for the season. There was a freak show panel and then some had to go. It was kind of a cruel and awful way to do it though -- each girl had a gown bag hanging on a hanger with her name on it and if there wasn't a gown inside the bag that meant "see ya!" So the list went down to 20 and after many tears and after another elimination the final cast was set at 14.
What would Jesus do?
When it came time for all of the 14 contestants to show up to start shooting the first episode only 13 girls arrived. Bouncy, quirky, Bible-thumping Amber was a no-show. She was missed immediately and Tyra announced that Amber wasn't able to be on the show for "personal reasons." So Lucky Lisa got a second chance and took Amber's place.
Time for a Ty-over!
The gals immediately headed to the Sally Hershberger salon for the mega transformations. Strangely, the only one who freaked out this time was the one who was already bald. They bleached Bianca's eyebrows and she was cranky. To be fair, there were several girls who had their eyebrows frosted...and...it'll take a little getting used to. They don't look so much like high fashion but a frat party prank gone terribly wrong.
Vote on whether the models looked better before or after their makeovers.
More model madness after the break!
Ain't no party like a house party
After the gals got modelfied, they got to check into their rockin' new house. What a fun place -- complete with a pool and Jacuzzi! Naturally there was a runway and all kinds of crazy dècor. We felt the urge to unpack and stay...even if we had to put up with the day-to-day insanity of the contestants.
Making the final cut.....or not
After an incredible photo shoot where the models recreated their childhood pictures, it was time for panel. Someone had to go home. Truth be told, most of the gals did a really great job -- especially for their first shoot. But the last girl called up was the first girl called out. Lisa didn't prove herself worthy and she was eliminated. Pity, we thought she would have tried extra hard but the sparkle just wasn't there.
What was she thinking?
Tyra came out to meet the gals of the Cycle 13 Collection looking incredible but speaking with some bizarre accent and rambling about thinking out of the box. It sounded French with a twist of ghetto. Naturally, the girls ate it up but we had a hard time stomaching it.
Weirdest conversation
The "who's a virgin?" conversation made us all a little uncomfortable. Pretty much anything that Amber did made us uncomfortable.
Most cringe-worthy moment
At audition panel Amanda explained that she lives in the Eastside of New Orleans in a pop-up trailer. They have no plumbing so she uses the bathroom "in the yard." If she has to "...go number two" she just goes to the gas station or McDonalds. Here's a little recommendation, Amanda: Models don’t talk about their poop. She didn't make the final cut to the house.
The Seriously? Award goes to…
Bianca complained about everything -- her makeover, her makeup, the other contestants. Seriously? We know it's fun for the producers to see quirky and sometimes mean contestants but come on -- she just seems like she's no fun to be around.
Great quotes -- hilarity ensues
"You know you’re supposed to have that burning sensation for your Lord Jesus instead of another man." Amber
"Growing up, I can't lie, I had a pretty hard life. It wasn’t exactly the easiest life I've ever lived." Sundai
"Nobody cheats on me." Laura, the cow castrator
"Are you awake?" Jay to the very quiet and seemingly comatose Nicole
We're just one week into Cycle 13 and it's already clear that the competition has been stepped up a notch since even last season. These girls may be shorties but they are gorgeous, they know what they're doing and they're in it to win it. So who will win it in the end? Make your predictions now so you can tell your friends that you called it on the first week.